Hot Girl of Horror #21: Kate Beckinsale

I'm not really a fan of the Underworld movies (I can't believe there are four now), and I hated Van Helsing (worst Dracula ever and talk about some awful, awful CGI), but I still like Kate Beckinsale. She's a good actress, and of course, she's drop dead gorgeous. From what everyone says, she's also the best thing about the completely unnecessary and bland Total Recall remake. Hopefully, she'll be in some better horror movies in the future. Maybe Vacancy was good, but I didn't see it. Van Helsing should've been good... Hugh Jackman, Dracula, Frankenstein's Monster, the Wolf Man. It takes some real talent to screw that up. Yeah, I'm still pissed about that movie. Frankenstein's Monster swinging on a cable? WTF? Even Beckinsale in a corset couldn't save that.

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Hot Girl of Horror #20: Shannyn Sossamon

I never saw Devour, Catacombs or One Missed Call (the remake) so I can't say anything about the horror films she has been in, but if they suck (and the reviews don't seem very flattering), it's not her fault. She is excellent in The Rules of Attraction and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Both are also amazing films. I was curious about The Day, but I'm a little tired of post-apocalyptic movies without any monsters, and I'm worried that is the case there. But it's probably still good. I'll definitely check it out one of these days. I just need a break after The Road, The Divide, and The Book of Eli. We need some more good monster movies. I can't wait for Harbinger Down. If there's one thing the world needs more of, it's old-school practical FX.

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Hot Girl of Horror #14: Scarlett Johansson

Eight Legged Freaks. That's it. The only horror movie she did, and I haven't seen it. Yes, I'm ashamed. What's really scary is she was in Home Alone 3. Ugh. I'm glad I dodged that bullet. Actually, "bullet" is probably too nice. "Exercise in pain" would be more fitting. The Black Dahlia almost qualifies... it's pretty much a slasher. Anyway, yeah, enough with the excuses. She's hot. I still can't believe some people don't find her attractive. Come on. Let's not dress up like a penguin and shoot rockets out our face. She's hot. You know it to be true.

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Hot Girl of Horror #11: Monica Bellucci

Brotherhood of the Wolf is my favorite film of hers, and if you've seen it, you'll definitely know why. The other big horror movie she did was Bram Stoker's Dracula in which she played the count's bride, but her part in that was pretty small. Still, you'll probably remember (she was topless). Those are the only two real horror movies she has done (that I can find at least). I don't count The Brothers Grimm or Irreversible even though the latter is pretty damn horrifying at times. I was lucky enough to catch Le Pacte des Loups in the theater, and I'm glad I did. If you missed it, I highly recommend it, and Monica Bellucci is a big reason why. She is gorgeous, and here's the proof.

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Hot Girl of Horror #10: Mila Kunis

American Psycho 2. Yep, Patrick Bateman's lovable antics got a sequel, and I watched it. Is it good? Not really, but it depends on what you think of Ms. Kunis. I actually didn't mind it. Sure, I don't really remember anything about it other than she's in it, and it's basically just another slasher cashing in on a famous movie's title, but it also gives you a ridiculous opening that undermines the last film's ambiguity and complexity. Still, I didn't exactly go into it with high expectations so I wasn't disappointed at all. As far as her other horror films, she had an uncredited part in Milo, a film from the creator of Anaconda (yes, that's how they're selling it) with the tagline, "Remember, Jason and Freddy were kids once too." I never heard of that one, and with a rating of 3.9 on IMDb, I don't think I'll be watching it. Maybe if Kunis was the star. She really hasn't done a lot of horror. Do you count The Book of Eli? I guess there's some Piranha TV movie... what the hell is that? It's odd the things you can find on IMDb. Anyway, time to say hello to Ms. Kunis...

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Hot Girl of Horror #9: Elisha Cuthbert

Besides being Jack Bauer's daughter, Ms. Cuthbert has starred in a few horror films including the House of Wax remake, Captivity, and a family horror movie called Believe. I didn't even realize there is such a thing as "family horror," but I guess The Legend of Sleepy Hollow (1949) would qualify, and I love that. Can't believe that's so old. Still, horror and family seem like opposites... "Alright kiddies, it's time to watch Martyrs!" Anyway, I never saw Captivity so I can't really comment on it. I heard it isn't that great (4.6 rating on IMDb), but I would watch it just to see her. I thought she had been in more horror movies, but that shows you what I know. House of Wax was ok I guess. Paris Hilton's death scene was the best part. I don't think I'd ever watch it again though. Alright, ready for the pictures? Yes, you've suffered enough.

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